Weak Ties

Why do we throw a party with a silly name like ‘Christmas Taco Tuesday Extravaganza’? I can think of a bunch of reasons, but here are the main two. 

First, tacos. Tacos are delicious. No explanation necessary. 

The second reason is a little harder to explain—but more important.

We throw this party because weak ties make each of us, our churches, our organizations, and even our city better. 

Let me explain. Back in 1973, a then-obscure professor wrote a paper contrasting what he called strong ties and weak ties. Strong ties are the relationships that carry the most emotional weight—our families, our closest friends, the people we’d take a bullet for. Deep trust. Shared history. High commitment.

We all need strong ties. 

Weak ties are different. They’re looser connections—acquaintances, colleagues you see occasionally, neighbors you say hi to on your walk, pastors at another church you know through someone else, or folks you meet because you share a space, not a life.

Recently, I had a ‘weak tie’ conversation. While waiting for our food at a local restaurant, the guy in front of me in line I found out that we shared a pool of good friends was a professor of American History. Being as our son is applying to graduate programs in the same field, I asked if the professor would be willing to meet with our son. “Of course.” A 75-minute meeting later that week, weak-ties for the win. 

Weak ties are all around us. Our youngest son has many positive influences in his life, one of which is the Parable guys’ study. Every Thursday night, we drive him down to Revive Church (who lets Parable use their space) to meet with a bunch of young men as they worship and study the bible. The Parable ministry (led by Hung Thach) is in part funded by churches like Cornerstone and GraceLB. Weak ties. 

On January 7, 2025, each of us were shocked by the devastation caused by the fires. Every leader I spoke with was ready to help the victims. But if you don’t know who to give to, where do you start? Through a weak tie connected to pastors Wayne Chaney and Joel Silva, churches gave sacrificially – money, air purifies, linens. In 60 days, we collectively gave over $350K in cash and new goods to fire victims in Altadena. Weak ties for the win. 

Strong ties are where we’re known and loved.
Weak ties are where things start to move.

They can feel awkward or optional—like coming to a taco party unsure who you’ll talk to.
But they matter more than we think.

That’s why we threw the party yesterday.

Because we love Jesus.
We love this city.
And sometimes weak ties start by sharing a table—even briefly.

Not everyone there will be close to you.
But someone there might matter later—in a way you can’t yet see.

Strong ties sustain us.
Weak ties surprise us.

Merry Christmas!

Eric (for the Collective team)